Charm Your Online Date’s Socks off With These Killer Conversation Tips
If you are actively looking for a romantic partner, then you might find dating different people pretty exciting. However, as fun as the activity is, you might still feel jittery at times. Your worries involve leaving a good impression, striking an engaging conversation, and keeping their attention. Thinking about it, you can say that it can be intimidating. While online dating is less anxiety-provoking, there’s no harm in polishing your skills and learning how to best charm your potential partner. Here are some dating conversation tips that you need to know (and apply) today!
Stop being boring with these dating conversation tips:
1. Get to know your date
Just because online dating is less stressful than dating in real life doesn’t mean you can’t exert extra effort! Make it a point to learn about the people you meet. That way, you will be able to enjoy the conversation more, and feel as if it is more natural.
What are some of the things you need to keep in mind? You need not prepare complicated questions because the basic ones will do. Learn about where they are from, what they do for a living, or what music they enjoy listening to. In addition, you may also try and figure out what their current hobbies are. If you get them to talk about something they like, they are more likely to be interested in you as well.
But of course, don’t make it a mission to let them talk and talk nonstop. The goal is to get to know them better and discover things you both like. By doing so, you’re also increasing the chance to win your date over.
2. Focus on passion
One of the best dating conversation tips out there is to focus on passion. You don’t want to spend a night talking about something that doesn’t pique your interest, right? It’s also not fun to narrate the whole story from when you woke up to when you are about to sleep.
Ask your online date about his or her passions because it’s more fun to talk about them. This is also a strong basis for a friendship if you find out that you share a similar passion.
3. Really listen
Sometimes, the best tip is just to shut the hell up, listen, and keep yourself from initiating a dirty conversation. We are talking about active listening, as it is a good sign that shows you care about what the person has to say. You are not merely waiting for your turn to speak, but you have genuine interest! How do you do this?
First, you need to maintain eye contact with your online date. Don’t text or play with your phone while talking to them. It’s not only rude. It’s a surefire way to get dumped! Next, make sure your body and head are pointing in their direction. Don’t move out of the frame when they are sharing something. Otherwise, it’ll seem as if you are not even paying attention to them.
You also need to check your facial expression and make sure you don’t end up rolling your eyes in boredom or sighing every now and then. These are obvious visual cues that you are already bored with them. Lastly, summarize what they say and let them know you are indeed listening. For example:
Online Date: I usually take my dog, Nala, out for a walk. Now, she’s sad because the whole family is in lockdown.
You: Oh! Poor Nala! She’s sad. She must have missed going to the park.
When you show that you are interested, your talks will become deeper and richer. Not to mention, you are also telling them that you still want to talk to them.
4. Remember the FORD method
FORD stands for Family, Occupation, Recreation, and Dreams. This is probably one of the easiest dating conversation tips you can remember. In fact, this guideline is widely used because it is effective when connecting with new people. It’s not just for dating. You can even use it when you are out enjoying a work party, attending a trade show, a wedding reception, and many more!
But are you curious about how to apply this particular method?
Get to know your online date’s family more by asking questions such as “Are you the oldest or youngest out of your siblings?” Don’t make this part seem like an interview, though. You may also share some stories or facts about your family members. This includes their interests and your fun moments together (relevant to your conversation) among others.
When conversing with your date, you may ask him or her what he does for a living. Be careful with how you ask the question and don’t sound offensive, especially if you sense that he or she is sensitive. However, if you find that they take pride in their job, continue to ask some occupation-related questions. Let it flow.
Everybody has hobbies. Ask your date what a fun day for them is, and what they like to do during weekends. Who knows? This is a teaser and might give you get a greater understanding of how you can date them in the future.
When you’ve pretty much covered everything and find that your date is willing to move on to “real talks,” ask them about their dreams or aspirations.
5. Faces, not spaces
Okay, so this might not be one of the usual dating conversation tips, but if you want to make a good impression on your date, keep reading. If you are really present in the conversation and you want to send the message that you are interested in what they are saying, then remember this! Look at faces, not spaces. In your case, you only have one date, so look at his or her face. When you are dating online, this will be pretty easier since you won’t feel tense compared to when you are meeting in person.
Lack of eye contact makes them feel as if you don’t really care. They might be reluctant to open up or continue the conversation any further. On the other hand, looking at their eyes completely without even turning the other way may make them uncomfortable. Bring this to a balance, and you’ll be alright!
6. Make your stories more interesting
Just by telling a story, you can already plant thoughts or ideas into the listener’s brain. That’s how powerful it is. When you are out on a date, remember not to underestimate how effective storytelling is. You don’t need to come up with some grand fake story just to keep your date glued to you. Instead, focus your energy on improving the way you deliver it. It will allow you to form a deeper relationship with him or her.
Here’s a tip – choose the best story. Is it something relatable? Does it have the power to move the feelings of the person who will hear it? Is it funny or scary? You definitely have a lot of life experiences, but if you can only tell one, will this be it?
7. Don’t throw in closed-ended questions
Your online date is not a formal interview. Although if you’re bitten by a love-at-first-sight bug, you’re probably applying to become the next partner.
If I were to go out with someone, I’d like to be able to have an engaging and meaningful conversation with him. With this, use open-ended questions and avoid those which can be easily answered with a “Yes” or “No.” The latter is pretty boring, while the use of open-ended questions will guarantee that you’ll talk for a longer time.
Here’s an example:
Closed-ended: Oh! So you’ve been to California. Do you love traveling?
Open-ended: So you’ve been to California. I’ve always wanted to go there. How was it?
However simple this may be, you’d be surprised with its effect! This is why this is one of the best (and easiest) dating conversation tips.
8. You might as well get their opinion on some things
For some reason, it is more stimulating to talk about opinions than facts. This doesn’t need to be too political, religious, or personal (these are sensitive or controversial topics), but it can be anything under the sun. For example: “I am really looking forward to a good vacation at the beach. Do you know any place fun?”
Still, there is no rule that you can’t have inspiring conversations when talking about “sensitive” topics. These are actually interesting, but people tend to avoid this since these aren’t exactly icebreakers. In general, it’s okay when both of you have already warmed up to each other, and are comfortable expressing your opinions. Additionally, you two must also respect each other’s opinions and be willing to learn from him or them.
Do you have any other dating conversation tips you’d like to share with the community?
Before you go, check out these helpful articles: Your Easy Guide to Charming Women With Humor, Plus ‘Does It Really Work?’ and Surefire Second Date Success: 11 Fun and Romantic Ideas.